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[ heart's a mess ]
09 September 2010 @ 01:05 pm
Guess what's back in tomorrow shut up I know what day it is Saturday? (And this I cling to, since it seems SErikson's The Crippled God won't be out until February '11. WOE!)

Well, this. Sort of. IN SPACE?Collapse )

Moved in, but computer time is still laughably negligible. New position? Who fucking knows. I hate getting yanked around at work more than anything -- if they end up giving the job to someone else after I was already confirmed, I am going to choke a bitch. And then find another job.

And now off to work. Hooray!
 
 
Current Music: Okkervil River & Julie Doiron - The Songwriter [Julie Doiron]
 
 
[ heart's a mess ]
17 August 2010 @ 01:03 am
So, the great moving adventure has finally commenced! Most of the big stuff moved out today (holy shit, I found my naginata and cane sword), though I'm relatively certain I'm going to be needing to rent a u-haul tomorrow to pull the rest -- and stuff like the bookshelf and coffee table. Also, I hate pulling apart those ridiculous white plastic shelves, so I'd like to avoid that if at all possible. Also, twenty bucks is pretty cheap.

Not entirely sure when the internet is supposed to be up in the new place. Hopefully soon, but it may take up to a week; either way I'll be busy busting my ass with all the unpacking anyway. Internet here at the old house is going to be cut tomorrow, and I'm moving my computer tonight because I am completely lame and realized at 11.30 at night (after I was in bed, which is always a little nervewracking in a new place) that I'd probably be wanting music tomorrow while I unpack, and ... yeah. MP3 player isn't charged, and I'd need to get the speakers from here anyway.

Honestly, I'm just hoping that I'll be able to get at least a little bit of time to relax before Saturday, because it's the only vacation time I'll get for a year, which sucks, but I'll get over with. D: Exciting things going on there, but I really don't want to talk about it. Work sucks, that's all. Vacation is relax time! ...sort of.

My friends and co-workers are awesome, though. I taxi'd two of them into work this afternoon, then went to pick up one more, who came back to help with the moving -- I'm super-glad, since he's a wiry dude and the boys would have had a lot more trouble with some of those appliances. And then Sarah came by when she got off and we dragged more stuff over in her car, and then we grilled steaks and sat out on my ghetto deck and had a pretty amazing wind-down session and it was really kind of wonderful. ♥

But ... yeah. Getting a little tired, so I suppose I'd better pack this shiny beast and get back to the new place, so I can set up a few nightlights before bedtime. I haven't been in a house that dark in a long, long time, ack. If I'm lucky (if that's the word), maybe I'll get to see one or two of the javelina that inhabit the wash behind the house.

See y'all when I get back!
 
 
Current Music: Iron & Wine - Cinder And Smoke
 
 
09 August 2010 @ 03:28 pm

Shearwater from Marcus Moonen on Vimeo.



This man just ... slays me, every time. That voice. Also, Silver Bodies live is heart-stopping. And a cover of What A Wonderful World at the end! Unexpectedly heartwarming to see that poor battered guitar is a Seagull, albeit a different model than my own.


Was kind of sort of plotting a huge post about my thoughts on SB1070 (fashionably late, hurr, because when I think about things I do it for a lot longer than most people realize) and why, despite leaning so far left it's a wonder I can stay vertical, I think the federal government is being a dick about the whole thing and why I absolutely support it. But then I realized that I've hardly seen a computer in the last few weeks, and I'm just a few days away from the move proper and freaking out and have lost a lot of stuff in the process, and am losing hair by the fistfuls while I interview people and try to keep my cool while trying to switch to a different department, and can't help but wonder how much would get lost and utterly ignored because the race card is in play, and so much of the opposition has presented an absolutely crazy picture that is so sensationalized, and so far away from reality that I can't help the manic bursts of laughter -- and, yeah. I wonder very hard what the point is, and who exactly is supposed to care. Mostly, I suppose, it's because I've been reading a lot on the internet, and just can't fathom where people who liken it to gestapo laws and concentration camps have put their functioning headmeat, and I'm frustrated by most of the response written by smug, self-satisfied right-wing fucksticks.

But. But. As an Arizona citizen, as a legal-immigrant supporter, and as someone who lives every day with the reality of what this law is trying to curtail, you're absolutely fucking right I support it. At the very least, if it doesn't go through, now that the issue has been brought out into the open and the federal government will finally do something about their own laws that they've ignored for so long already and an actual solution can be found.
 
 
Current Music: Wye Oak - I Don't Feel Young
 
 
08 July 2010 @ 01:07 pm
Aw man, so disappointed about the World Cup semifinal still -- yesterday was a lot of slumping around work and making sadface at sympathetic co-workers, despite loling through the better part of the game (I blame RoosterTeeth and Per's new name, Nutsacker, which somehow became our cheer whenever he showed up near a ball). When I said I wanted my goalie battle between Muslera and Neuer, I didn't mean like this, dammit --

Uncharacteristically, Fernando Muslera has been my favorite goalie this tournament, though I'm sort of in love with Iker Casillas, with Neuer a distant third. Hell, Muslera is possibly my favorite goalie since Oliver Kahn, which is saying a lot, since he's still my fucking hero.

Anyway, give the Germans four more years and some experience, and they're going to tear shit up. Especially Müller and Özil; those kids are awesome and adorable too, which is weirdly important to a girl watching soccer. Hell, Euro 2012 will be exciting.

Well, I'm hoping Spain takes the cup. If we've got to lose, might as well be to the winners, right?

Disappointment runs rampant this week, it seems. Super exciting: MATADOR @ 21, in Vegas. About four hours away. Shearwater, Sonic Youth, Belle & Sebastion, fucking Guitar Wolf -- sounds great, though I'd only be going for Shearwater because it's hard to get free days off, especially with moving eating all my vacation and Personal Holidays.

I suppose I didn't need to worry; they don't sell tickets for single days, and the cheap ticket price is two hundred dollars. Guess who'll be waiting for the Western USA tour? ;A;

Between packing and soccer-nerding, writing hasn't been happening much. The few minutes I do get in front of the computer are late after work, kind of one-eyed blinking at the monitor and trying not to drool on myself and whatnot. (I suspect a large part of the drooling comes from reading Gravity's Rainbow and attempting to make any sense of it, but I could be wrong.) Kinda just want the moving thing done with. It's going to be close between former tenants, landlord repair and us moving in, but the price is awesome and that's what matters most at the moment. Birthdays coming up, too! Chris and I have, I think, decided that we'll get ourselves a Wii as a sort of joint gift, because we have Wii games and the house Wii was actually Linh's. I'd be just as happy with the 360 (I have a few games for that, too), but I think the Wii is cheaper and now that my PS2 is crapped out that would give me a system to play Okami on again, too. :D

Anyway, off to work. For you wowcats, my realid is shiiku@gmail.com, and very rarely these days you will see me there.
 
 
Current Music: Elbow - Grace Under Pressure (Live)
 
 
[ heart's a mess ]
Yeah, I kinda spaced it last night, but I was being productive around the house. And today?

Oh god, today. THE SURPRISE JOB.Collapse )


Anyway, music! That's the important part!

A song that makes me sad: There's actually a huge list of these on my playlists. Tons and tons, but I guess I'll go for the chest-smashing grief tunes, because ... well, as awful as they are to me, they're my favorite. Black Eyes is currently holding that position, but that's a fresh wound -- I had The Golden Archipelago in my stereo when I was driving down to visit the grandfather the last time, and I sobbed all the way to Phoenix. Lines like: and what the body allows/is a flash in the heart/until the memory dies/and a forever life/is an infinite lie hung wide suddenly took on this immediate, churning meaning when stacked up against this amazing man in the last hours of his life with a body just collapsing, whose illness had become such a part of him we'd sort of integrated it into our minds and -- still assumed he'd keep on trucking forever, because that's what it felt like. Even now, looking back at those last few days, for everything happening it didn't sink in that it was the end, and finding out he was gone felt like a great betrayal.

But that isn't the song I'm giving you.

Little-known fact about Miri: I was set to perform Memory from Cats at the pop concert my senior year of high school, but I had to back out because I couldn't get through the whole song without crying. No lie.

But that isn't the song I'm giving you, either.

You get Maybe Sprout Wings, by The Mountain Goats. John Darnielle's voice is a tenuous things; he's a bit like Jeff Mangum of NMH in that way -- but it's unforgettable, and paired with some of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard. This is one of them. It's short, and very simple -- a few chords on a guitar and just a tiny, tiny bit of background, but it's absolutely haunting.

I thought of old friends
the ones who'd gone missing
said all their names three times.
Phantoms in the early dark,
canaries in the mines.


John playing this live is intense, too, oh my god.

(Wow, that was all way longer than it needed to be. Sorry.)

A song that reminds me of someone: This one was difficult only for choosing which one. My mom and I had a weird relationship when I was a teenager -- I was quietly, mostly politely rebellious -- I went and hung out with my friends while they got smashed and smoked pot and had a lot of sex (though I only engaged in a little bit of each while they went to excess -- I guess, I was kind of the designated driver-type) and was generally the kid telling jokes while everyone else was doing their thing. But yeah -- lots of rebellion, lots of weird anger and us not understanding each other at all, and then one day I picked up Sarah MacLachlan's Fumbling Towards Ecstasy at Wal*Mart on our way up to the Main Ranch and she went nuts because she'd been looking for Possession for ever and it was my favorite song at the time and in that one random moment of bonding everything was suddenly okay, and we've been absolute best friends since. And I should probably give you that one, but you probably have it, so you're getting number two -- there'd occasionally be songs where she'd come home and be like 'hey, have you listened to this? It reminded me of you.' Among these have been Nina Gordon's Tonight & the Rest of My Life, KT Tunstall's Black Horse & the Cherry Tree, and Chris Cornell's Can't Change Me. I never saw the connection (though it was always interesting to gain new insight into how she saw me through the songs), but they never fail to remind me of her and those weird music conversations that brought us back together when they pop up on my playlist.

she's going to change the world
but she can't change me
no, she can't change me.


complete list of promptsCollapse )
 
 
Current Music: Blaqk Audio - On A Friday | Powered by Last.fm
 
 
 
Okay, I feel a bit douchey for it being only day 3 and I'm already going back to repeat a band, but all of my other really happy songs are going elsewhere on this list, and this one seriously does have me grinning like a complete asshole whenever it makes its way onto winamp or the car stereo.

It's also a sad song for me, but I can live with it -- it's got good feelings despite the fact that it's a good-bye song (it's kind of the break-up song of Okkervil River and Jonathan Meiburg), and also it's a hell of a lot of fun to sing along with.

I'm talking, of course, about Lost Coastlines by Okkervil River, featuring the lovely Jonathan Meiburg.

And the video is wonderful, too. :D





complete list of promptsCollapse )
 
 
Current Music: "Lost Coastlines" by Okkervil River
 
 
[ heart's a mess ]
This also changes a whole lot, but for now? Oh, I've got one. Hey Soul Sister by Train. Now, Train has always had inane lyrics and simple-at-best music, but god does this song send me into a frothing frenzy of hate.

Well, not quite but I really want to punch the guy singing, and then wrap that goddamn ukelele around his neck.

complete list of promptsCollapse )

--

In other news, this is pretty funny in a sad sort of way. Generally I'm pretty laid back and liberal, but I'm (mostly) all for the border control law Jan Brewer has put on the table. See, the principal thing is that it essentially gives law enforcement the same jurisdiction over illegals as US citizens. You know that if you got hit by a car driven by an illegal alien, the cop would have to let him go because he isn't under US laws? This will change that. No, they can't just go 'holy shit get that brown guy!' and demand papers and whatnot -- they have to have due cause to make the stop.

The reason I say mostly, however, is because I'm not naive. I understand that -- especially in a place like this -- there's going to be overzealous cops, not to mention the fact that anti-mexican sentiment is low-to-medium but definitely present here in AZ; some deserved, some not at all, but definitely not on such a sweeping basis. 'Due cause' can be interpreted in many ways, and I don't doubt there's going to be some taking advantage over the vagaries of that phrase -- like, for instance, the fact that three people standing together on a street corner can technically constitute a 'gang', and there's your due cause.

Oddly (or not) enough, most of the legal immigrants I know have a high level of support for the law. Their bitch is generally the same as ours, except they deal with that and then have their own people making them look bad, and ... yeah. No bueno.

 
 
Current Music: Okkervil River - On Tour With Zykos
 
 
And it's useless! Meme from daathic

Anyone who looks at this entry has to post this meme and their current wallpaper on their LiveJournal. DO IT IF YOU WANT.
▮ Explain in five sentences why you're using that wallpaper!
▮ Don't change your wallpaper before doing this! The point is to see what you had on!

no, it's not as cool as you'd think.Collapse )
 
 
Current Music: The Antlers - Kettering
 
 
[ heart's a mess ]
20 May 2010 @ 06:55 pm
I had no idea Bob was updating again. I had no idea there was an LJ comm..! This absolutely made my day:

nariobros


I had to go back and re-read it because it'd been about two years, and I'm still immature enough to find it hilarious. (Especially the Genma/Hayate, bahahaha) Itachi in a Peach-style Akatsuki dress nearly made me fall out of my chair; gotta icon me some of that. xD

Go waste a few minutes and lol with me now. If you want to start from the beginning (it goes by quick), just hit the archives and start at the oldest; Bob posted 5-10 strips per entry so it follows order that way.
 
 
Current Music: Wye Oak - I Hope You Die
 
 
15 May 2010 @ 09:59 am
The funeral was Thursday, a traditional requiem mass in latin that was the grandfather's wish. I wish I'd been more alert for it, but I was under a bit of a codeine haze from the cough meds and was having trouble staying upright on heels. The history after the service was quite interesting, the way the basics of the ritual have been performed for two thousand years -- I'll just never get used to the way religious funerals are turned from mourning a loved one's death to proselytizing/telling everyone they deserve to burn. Wondering what the sacred pot holder symbolizes. The chanting/singing was beautiful. Watching some of the strongest people I've ever met break down like children? Absolutely heartbreaking.

Went to Urgent Care after the viewing, before the funeral -- apparently I have a double ear infection, throat infection, and laryngitis, though the doctor couldn't determine exactly what the throat thing was -- on antibiotics now and it's easing, but still very little voice. I'll be back at work later this afternoon, so I hope I have just a little more; I'd take the day off today, too, but I think my boss would kill me outright. I'll talk to HR this afternoon, and see if they can't offset yesterday's absence with some vacation time or something -- money's pretty tight lately, so I really just can't afford to take off the better part of a week, augh.

Really wishing I had the time, though. I've been talking to Matt, and I think I'm going to go talk to Albertson's as soon as I'm fully over being sick -- I'm sort of stuck in my job, and don't really have a place to step down to, so I think it'd be best to find another job before I start making my intentions known. Not really all that excited to go back to grocery, but I've been there, I know exactly what I'm dealing with, and I wouldn't be taking a cut in either hours or pay. And no pushing credit apps! That alone is enough to get me moving, eh.

Anyway, that's that. Nothing much else worth talking about, save for the fact that apparently mom and Robert hired another asshole they thought they knew that convinced them to buy a lot of cows, let him tend their farm in Missouri, then took off with about $7,500 in various bank accounts he could reach (as well as selling two bulls and taking that money, too) and abandoned the herd, all without saying anything and not intending to until mom called his ex-girlfriend and he called mom to tell her to 'leave her out of this'. And Robert doesn't want to press charges at all, but the rest of us are telling mom to do it anyway because seriously, what the fuck. That's way beyond a felony, and this dude smells pretty strongly of redneck con artist. Not to mention mom has to get down there to make sure the herd is fine and that nothing else is missing -- he says he left the truck keys in the truck, which makes me think that's probably gone, too -- and try to sell them (and not at a sale barn, considering the loss they'd take) and get back before a month is up, so she can keep her job here. It's stupid business, and I'd defenestrate that guy in a heartbeat, given the opportunity.
 
 
Current Music: Iron & Wine - Teeth in the Grass | Powered by Last.fm